Shameless Product Plug Alert

One of the reasons I love travelling is because I get to see how different places do things.

Today's case in point:
the Purewick External Female Catheter, pictured above.
Which Shoestring General is using (and of which the last umpteen places hadn't yet heard).

In a nutshell:
1) Grandma (or any female patient) is incontinent, or non-ambulatory, a frequent pee-er, or any combination of the three.
2) She's gotta pee, which means sliding a bedpan in under her 400# backside, or broken hip, or moving her bony, cachectic bones, or needs 15 minutes per potty trip to bedside commode or bathroom, twice every hour, or any one of 27 other reasons.
3) Indwelling catheters are on the hospital sh*t list, because they provide UTIs with some regularity, which the hospital now gets to eat the cost for treating.

Enter the Purewick EFC.

As you can see above, it's 10" or so by 1" diameter soft plastic hot dog, with a central wicking tampon-ish core.
You put the white cotton side on your female pt.'s outgoing waste evacuation region, as seen below,

 

inside a diaper or underpants if possible, hook the other end of the magic peesucker to wall (or portable) suction tubing, set it and forget it, and you're done. When it works as advertised (which, anecdotally from me is about 95% of cases), it does exactly what is promised. And even when it's only partially successful it cuts way down on catheters, bedpans, diaper changes, and stinky undies.

It collects the urine in a standard suction canister.
Which can be counted for I+O purposes, sent/withdrawn for standard lab and POCT UA, urine Hcg and drug screens, as necessary. (Urine Cx, not so much).

My no-BS rating: Farking GENIUS! Twenty stars!!!

Eliminates 90% of your female caths as wholly unnecessary.
Which cuts way down on UTIs, and skin breakdown.
And keeps patient and bed less wet and stinky.
Which keeps pt. (and family) happier.

You've just made the day for all CNAs, clinical nurses, risk management, infection control, administration, Press-Ganey, and the CFO, all of whom will wet their pants with joy because 50% of your patients no longer will.

I wish I'd thought of this. I could retire on the royalties.
For that matter, I wish anyone had thought of this 25 years ago, just to save me a few hundred catheterizations. (Plus the ones I missed.)

Seriously, this thing is fantastic. If your hospital isn't using it, clamor for it yesterday, and don't take no for an answer.

Full disclosure: I'm getting zero bucks, nor any other consideration for saying it.
If you're the company marketing it, and you want a testimonial from an experienced clinical practitioner, I'm your pigeon - in return for one steak dinner. Really.
And if you're the Real American Genius who invented it, your steak dinner is on me.
Really.

The first shift you don't have to change 7 diapers, or help tiny frail grandma to the bathroom 10 times, and she can sleep peacefully all night long and stay dry as a bone while you get the ordered UA, and strict I+O tally, you'll want to buy that inventor a steak dinner too.

But if I had invented it, it would have rolled out as the Purewick External Elimination Device, and abbreviated as the P.E.E. Device.
Because I'd totally have gone there.

If your hospital doesn't adopt these, you're living in the 19th century.
Neener neener.