Thursday, January 15, 2015

And the other shoe drops...

My vacay was lovely. As will become apparent, I should have stayed there.
(If you have the chance for two weeks on Maui, I highly recommend it. Anytime.)

Upon my return, I found out the reason they were so cheerful about letting me have time off for the holidays, was that in their ceaseless efforts to not go broke implementing ObamaCare, my facility will be "re-organizing", and wished me their best in securing another position. Just. Like. That.
The fact that I'm experienced, at the top pay tier, and recently passed the half-century milestone were all purely coincidental, they assured me. And I have a bridge for sale too, right next to some beachfront property in Kansas.

Step Two was dusting off the resume, and getting a gig with any number of nursing registry agencies hereabouts that are swamped with the need for ED nurses locally, because for some reason, there are a ton of facilities with openings for non-permanent personnel on all shifts. Everywhere.
Doubtless this is just another purely random coincidence, I'm sure.

The sweetener is that they pay on average 10-20% more than my former employer, for doing the same job, and (after a few months not there), even including my former hospital home. So they laid me off to get me a raise, and set my own days and hours forever, including no more holidays at my discretion, and all it cost them was any shred of loyalty or concern for their best interests I might have had after the last ten-plus years in their trenches.

Such a deal.
The other bummer was instantly being ripped from amongst the greatest bunch of people, doctors, nurses, and staff, I've ever worked with. $#!^ happens.

The fly in the ointment was that I needed to do all the pre-employment hoops I haven't jumped through since Clinton was president, and dig up paperwork from the late Pleistocene, as well as document my decades of competencies in everything, from scratch. (Satisfying my inner hyper-anal control freak, I have so far aced everything they've thrown at me. And thank the Flying Spaghetti Monster I can do this stuff online, at home, in my pajamas, whenever I feel the urge. Yay, 21st century technology.)

During which, it turns out that between eating like a teenager, no small amount of it grazing on craft service, and the very same two decades of dealing with nightshift ED work and the lovely people deposited on my gurneys, my blood pressure seems to have decided to translate into flight data from a space launch liftoff, after being textbook normal up to at least six months ago.

Oh goody. After a quarter-century in healthcare, I always wondered what it'd be like to be the patient. (Not.)

I have consequently been just a wee bit pre-occupied with securing gainful employment, and not having my head explode, while finding a regular physician for the first time since I was a teenager, managing new meds, and embarking on a new quest to burn off at least a decade of crap daily diet and not enough cross training. With my former health insurance a distant memory.

So the 20 extra pounds around my gut are my fault, and the ED is the ED, but a hearty "Fuck You" to president for-life? HopeyDopey, and his ceaseless efforts to destroy the 17% of the American economy that has been my career, by mucking up the revenue stream for all hospitals. The only silver linings are that having discovered my new health situation, I won't be stroking out from his upcoming State Of The Union, 'cuz I've got meds to fix that now, and because of totally screwing the pooch for the medical industry, there are suddenly no shortage of doctors happy to see me for cash-for-service, indefinitely.

Regular blogging will resume when the recent roller coaster comes in for a landing.

The fivefold teaching moments are thus:

The government is not here to help you. Ever.
Neither is your employer. Loyalty is for dogs. Their end of the contract comes when the paycheck clears. Anything else is icing on the cake, but don't count on it.
Keep your resume current and updated.
More veggies, less pizza.
More PT, sergeant, more PT. Because I miss the Daily Seven like BUDS candidates miss getting wet and sandy in January.

And if you thought I was a non-cheery cranky caustic SOB before all this needless personal drama,

Back regularly as soon as I can. The medical chances of me shutting up on the internet are about 8 billion to 1, against.


  1. Good luck bro. Isn't it amazing how the competent always suffer at the hands of those who only APPEAR competent?

    Welcome to the land of Obama. He delayed his policies till the last two years of his term to disguise the full effects of them from the American people. Hopefully the sheeple will realize how much of a fool they've been, how reality (which is dreadful) trumps fantasy and we'll finally be able to turn this country around.

    Being realistic I doubt it though. Kickass in your new job, but remember that loyalty doesn't exist for 90 percent of the population. Look out for number one at all times.

  2. I was wondering why you were taking time past the vacation 2 weeks to post to your blog.

    "With my former health insurance a distant memory."

    I have to wonder if that is why they did that; paying you 10-20% more minus what they put into your health insurance and the other costs of a full time employee, as long as they and no single hospital employs you for more than 29 hours a week, could be a bargain, especially going forward.

  3. Best of luck in the job search and for your health. I can tell you are resilient and will do what is needed to get back on track.

    My wish for you is a nickel every time one of your former co-workers says "Gee, I wish Shepherd of the Gurneys still worked here."

  4. Never done "day temping" but my last full time perm role ended April 2010.
    The worst its ever been was a long term (6month) role, 4 weeks off, 4 weeks on, 4 weeks off, 6 month role.

    8 weeks out of work in a year is sucky, but its hardly unsurvivable.

  5. Sorry to hear of your job troubles, but, really, are you surprised? The only "loyalty" the suits understand, is that which you feel towards them. Sadly, you likely do understand LOYALTY, better than the entire mash up of suits and clipboard cuties rolled into one steaming pile! Good luck, watch your back (as if you had to be told, right?), and best of luck. I've been an RN since 1979. Just watch, next nursing shortage, the suits will be whining that employees "have no loyalty"! Color me astonished!

  6. Sorry for your trouble, have walked in your shoes. It sucks.