So Much For "Any Hospital Can Do This Now" Happygas

(NBC News) New guidelines for the personal protective equipment that health workers should have on when treating Ebola patients make clear that what you wear counts — but even more important is how you put it on and take it off.

And the guidelines that the World Health Organization updated Friday suggest only highly trained medical professionals should be taking on the dangerous job of caring for Ebola patients, say the country’s leading doctors at the National Institutes of Health.        

“Anybody could do this, but the training process is something that takes a lot of time,” Dr. Francis Collins, who heads the National Institutes of Health, told NBC News in an interview.

Treating Ebola patients does not have to be dangerous, Collins said. “But it takes a lot of time to make it safe.”

That was obvious in a demonstration given this week at the NIH clinical center, where Dallas nurse Nina Pham was cared for until she was released earlier this month. It took a full 10 minutes to gear up Kevin Barrett, a specialist nurse who helped care for Pham.

So, it only took two different import patients, two additional hospital-acquired infections, forty false alarms, a few million dollars in direct healthcare costs, tens of millions in opportunity costs for jetliners and cruise ships pulled off-line, and several thousand people quarantined voluntarily for surveillance monitoring, to figure out that the CDC director, the NIAID director, the White House Press Secretary, The DHS national security assistant, and The President were all talking out their back ends for two or three months.

                              As Borat would say,

                                "Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice!"

It's a good thing this wasn't over anything important.

Now that we know how to dress to treat it, WHAT are we doing to keep it from getting here in the first place?

Oh yeah, that would be NOTHING.

I feel so safe now!